Book Review: Ann Coulter - If Democrats Had Any Brains, They’d Be Republicans
Seldom in life do I start a book that I just can not finish. Congratulations to Ms. Coulter, she has earned this rare distinction. If you have bought or are planning on picking up a copy of her latest dribble, I hope you have a table leg that needs balancing, because that is just about the best use you’re going to get from it.
A little bit about me…I like long walks on the beach, my favorite color is blue, and I absolutely do not understand how people - even uber successful people - can be so in love with themselves. After reading just fifty pages of this book, I now know why Ms. Coulter has never been able to tie the knot. She doesn’t need anyone else in her life. The love she has for herself is more than enough to keep away any lonely feelings. It would not surprise me in the least to learn that one of her favorite past times is to sit in front of a cozy fire and hug up on herself.
But back to the book, and we must be quick because I don’t know how much longer I can hold off the urges to burn this damn thing and dance around the flames. The first thirty pages really are a self love-fest, I kid you not. In them, Ann discusses how right she is and how wrong those that disagree with her are, including fellow Republicans. She goes on to point out (and by point out I mean beat you over the head) her notion that the reason other Republicans don’t like her is because she is a better writer and she sells more books than them. Seriously??!!
From there Ann launches into about 100 short chapters that lead in with a paragraph or two about her stance on a particular policy subject and is then followed by pages of past outrageous quotes she’s given on that subject. Now come on, only a person that wants to procreate with themselves would think that readers want to pay 30 bucks just to re-read their old soundbites.
And that’s it folks, that pretty much sums up the entire 269 pages.
Now, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m a pretty conservative guy. 9 out of 10 times, I’m with Ann Coulter when it comes to her stances. But there is such a thing as being obnoxious and offensive, and wouldn’t you know, those also happen to be two words that easily describe good ole’ Ann. For example, the terms raghead and camel jockey (which she uses with pride). As it turns out, they’re offensive slurs meant more to agitate an audience than to educate them.
The point that I desperately reach for (much like I find myself also reaching for a can of gas to douse this book with) is that there is such a thing as messaging. And wouldn’t you know, how one messages their package has a lot to do with whether or not that package is accepted or rejected. Who would have thought?
This is why Ann Coulter will always be a greater liability to the Republican party than an asset. People hear her often hateful message and watch her turn an intolerant shoulder to opposing views and call them Godless, and that is the image that they associate with the Republican party.
Seriously, as Republicans, can we please denounce this woman before it is too late? And in case you are wondering, Ann, no I am not railing on you in hopes that you will be put out of business and then I can start selling books. I’m railing on you because you suck as both a person and a face for my party.